Black Bunny Killer
by Traveling Moon
Summary: Terrifying rumors has been going around regarding an infamous Yato Serial Killer who has chosen Kabukichou as his new hunting ground. At the same time, a certain red-head Yato girl and a Sadistic Shinsengumi officer was reported missing- together. Not to mention the fact some psychopathic brother was spotted roaming around in his spacecraft near Earth. What could this mean!
1. Chapter 1

**Prologue**

It was a stormy night.

In the midst of wild winds blowing in all directions, the cornered Yato knew he had no other choice. It was either "Fight" or "Flight". He had to make a decision, quick, before the shadow of his death will arrive.

In that immediate moment, he took the "Flight" route. It was simple, really, like playing a game. Kind of like the Dragon Quest. You can fight the monster or run away and let your friends do all the work while you collected whatever goods you can find on the floor. And hell, he was pretty sure that he was good at that game.

With an injured knee and a missing arm, he took shelter in a small alley way. Cold raindrops were trickling down his face as he slid his back against the bricks. His eyes- blurred and heavy as a bag of sand due to blood loss- tiredly scanned around the area with a light of hope. Maybe he will survive. Maybe one of his friends will rescue him before his life HP dropped to 0.

Then the man remembered: he didn't have any friends. He spent most of his Friday nights and Saturday afternoons in front of the screen on order to perfect his combination attack.

The Yato could cry.

Just then, he noticed that the blood from his missing arm was being carried into a small stream, running down the drain which was right outside the alley way.

Immediately, he knew that his careless mistake has led to his discovery. He swore, pushed himself off the floor, and was about to flee when a voice from above reached him.

"Many years of being a warrior, yet you made that considerably dumb mistake? Have you no pride left in our blood?"

A weapon in gray smashed the floor where the man had stood into pieces. As luck may have it, the man was able to dodge with his instincts. In the darkness, he crawled with a light outside of the alley way as his objective.

The shadow sighed. It'd then jump down from the top of the lantern to stand in front of the man with an expressionless face.

"I had faith in you, you know. Faith that you will honor our bloodline by dying as a warrior; as a Yato. But look at this sight," a small smirk appeared ghostly on the shadow's face, "I see that I was wrong."

"Yes, you are wrong," coughed the Yato who was face down in the dirt, blood spurting from his wound, "to die in honor is not a way of Yato. We fight. Fight until the day we die. How we die does not matter. After all, a corpse is just a corpse."

"What would you know about fighting?" asked the shadow monotonously, "you, who's dying like a stabbed pig in some alley way on this planet far from a battlefield. You, who chose to flee rather than faced me. You, who pushed back your true desire to kill… what would you know?"

The Yato man smiled.

"I know of the warmth of the sun on my face. Of the clear sky beyond the darkest clouds. Of the joy in spending a whole day playing Dragon Quest," he breathed, " andI know that I will no longer kill as my blood demands me to."

"Then you should just die."

Said the shadow as a gray parasol struck down.

* * *

After washing impurities from its hands, the shadow opened its blood-dyed parasol and walked out, never once glancing back at the mess it has made.

It took five hours later for someone to discover a body of a veteran Yato in the alley way. The corpse, as reported by the unlucky passerby, was face down in the dirt with slight a slight smile on his face. Behind him was the familiar message written in blood of the victim himself. The word SHAMED screamed at anyone who came across the alley.

It was only two hours later that the newspaper would arrive at the Yorozuya office, informing them of the death of a Yato. And from the bloody message left behind, there was no doubt that the killer was same person who caused the previous seven deaths in the last two months.

Killing a Yato was quite a difficult task, after all. No wonder the adapted name of this Yato Serial Killer was spreading fast like a wild fire, waking disturbances and fear anywhere it reached.

The name of the Black Bunny Killer, that is.

* * *

**I have work, I have school, I have finals, and I have life smacking my face like a bitch from all directions.**

**So why started this possibly long fanfic? I don't know what the hell I am thinking! HAHAHAH.**

**PLZ COMMENT AND REVIEW!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Usual is never quite usual**

It was just another ordinary day at Yorozuya. Shinpachi arrived early (as usual) to pick up the newspaper that was still lying on the front door due to Gintoki's laziness. He'd then take his ordinary steps into the Yorozuya office and was greeted with an ordinary sight of the silver hair Samurai, dead drunk on the couch with the television turned on.

Shinpachi sighed.

"Gin-san, how many times do I have to tell you to turn the TV off when you are going to sleep? You are just adding unnecessary numbers to our electricity bills, you know?"

"Ah, shut it, Patsuan. Why are you always nagging at me first thing in the morning? Can't you tell that I am drunk?" grunted Gintoki lazily as he got up, his hair sticking out like some unkempt grass field. A bottle of Sake and strawberry milk mixed together lay wasted by the couch.

At that, Shinpachi popped a vein in his forehead.

"BECAUSE YOU ARE ALWAYS COMPLAINING TO ME ABOUT HOW THE ELECTRICITY BILL IS SO EXPENSIVE, YOU USELESS PERM!"

"I LEFT THE TV ON BECAUSE I WANT TO HEAR KETSUNO ANNA FIRST THING IN THE MORNING, NOT YOUR MOTHERLY NAGGING! NO WONDER HIRO-KUN TURNED REBELLIOUS. IT IS BECAUSE OF YOU!"

"WHO THE HELL IS HIRO-KUN?!"

Regardless of their argument, Shinpachi picked up the bottle on set it on the table. There was no use in fighting with Gintoki when he was this hung over, after all. All the boy could do was to wait for the Samurai to sober up and realize how stupid he was being by himself (which, usually, he never came to realize that fact).

Gintoki- still looking green- directed his attention to the television and turned up the volume while Shinpachi unfolded the newspaper.

'_Black Bunny Killer Strikes Again!'_

Those big black letters screamed at Shinpachi.

_'__Another murder case of a Yato-'_

Said the television, before it will be cut short because Gintoki shuffled the channel around, changing the image of a serious looking reporter into a stripper straddling a cow.

"Change the channel back, you fool!" yelled Shinpachi, slapping the newspaper at his employer's face at full force, "can't you take a look at the real issue at hands instead of looking at a stripper in the morning?!"

"Real issues? You want to know what the real issues are?!" shot back Gintoki who fell to the floor, a hand rubbing his swollen cheek, "it's domestic abuse! This, THIS is the real issue, Patsuan! How could you hit me? Even Ketsuno Anna never hit me!"

"Most people haven't been hit by Ketsuno Anna!"

"Well, she and I have a special connection! She just doesn't know it yet. But I know that our relationship in the future will involve her spanking me…"

"I DON'T WANT TO HEAR THAT SHIT!" shouted Shinpachi, blushing at the topic that involved any kind of kinky play due to his virgin status, "at any rate, you should be paying attention to the news! The victims are those mighty warriors of the Yato clan, you know? What if something were to happen to Kagura-chan?!"

"Kagura will be fine, you idiot. A mountain gorilla… I mean, a girl who can stop a bike with one hand wouldn't any problem dealing with some serial killer."

"What kind of logic is that? Besides, despite all that is said and done, all the victims thus far are veteran warriors. They were the type that could and would have killed a person within just a heartbeat. Yet, they have all fallen to the same killer. Even Kagura-chan would have a trouble dealing with the killer."

Gin sighed. "You are looking at it too seriously. There's no proof that the guy will come after Kagura. You said so yourself that the victims are veterans, correct?"

"Well, yes."

"But Kagura ain't no veteran. She's just an illegal immigrant who moved from her planet since when she was young. The guy probably doesn't even know she exists."

"But…"

Dismissively, Gin rolled on his back to face the couch, making it impossible to read his expression. "Kagura doesn't fit into the victims' profile. Besides, the killer only strikes after dark. As long as she gets home before then, she will be safe."

Quiet filled the room while a small smirk appeared on Shinpachi's face. Despite his appearance of being not interested, Gintoki knew an awful lot about this killer, which meant that he must have done his own research out of his concerns for Kagura.

"Ohohoho," teased Shinpachi, "I see how it is. You're such a Tsudere sometime."

"Who are you calling a tsudere, you Sis-con?! Just because some Yato serial killer is roaming around, you're kicking up such a fuss!"

"I'm not a Sis-con! I'm just worried that the guy might hurt Kagura-chan is all!"

At the loud mention of her name, the Yato girl who was disturbed from her slumber decided to make her grand entrance by hurling the closet door at the two men.

"SHUT UP! THE ONLY THING THAT WILL HURT ME RIGHT NOW IS THE LACK OF SLEEP, YOU FOOLS!" she yelled.

BAM!

Taking a direct hit in the face, the two struggled to get off the floor before Kagura's giant sukonbu box could hit them too.

"You brat! Who's going to pay for that door!?" shouted Gintoki. Two hit in the face after he has just woken up less than 10 minutes ago? _Seriously?_

"Hell if I care! Look at this," the girl said, pointing under her eyes, "the bags under my eyes are even darker than your future! And that's pretty freaking dark!"

"You complain about your skin," said Gintoki, "but you suck my wallet dry all the time! My wallet is now empty, just like my soul! I have no time to listen to your skin-deep woes, young lady!"

_(Author's note: It somewhat rhymed, didn't it? Sorry. I just had to point that out no matter what.)_

Shinpachi, recovering from the hit, joined in.

"What are you guys talking about?! I'm the one who's suffering here! I wear glasses, so I can see my future pretty well… AND IT ISN'T DARK!"

Screams, shouts, and cries were heard throughout the Yorozuya. Soon later, Otose sent Tama up stairs to shut her loud tenants up for good.

That was usual morning.

The _unusual _was what came after Kagura decided to take Sadaharu out for a walk, and never came back home.

* * *

**Kabukichou: 3 AM**

The street was chilly that night due to the wetness of the storm before, plus the drizzling rain that was lightly tapping on the ground. But despite the fog and coldness, figures of two men could be seen running around furiously.

"Gin-san!" panted Shinpachi as he joined Gintoki by the side of the street. "Have you found her yet?"

"No." Replied Gin shortly. His face was dark with such temper that would send chills running down anyone's back. Kagura has been gone for more than 19 hours now, and no one has even seen the trace of her.

And she said that she was only taking the dog out for a god damn walk.

"That girl sure is taking her time with the walk. Who normally walks the dog this long?"

"Gin-san, this is very unusual. I think that we should report this to the police. What if…"

"I know, Patsuan. But it hasn't been 24 hours yet. They won't take the case in."

"But this is a special case. A Yato serial killer is walking around, and the chances of her being spotted by him are pretty high. She stood out among the crowd with that parasol and skin."

"Dammit." Gin murmured. "Fine. We'll go the Shinsengumi and pull some strings. If it turns out that she is just out for a long walk, I swear I will shave that girl's head."

Just as Shinpachi was about to nod in agreement, beams of lights flashed into the faces of the two Yorozuya members along with shouts from all directions.

"Who goes there?!"

"Put your hands up in the air!"

"Okita- taichou, is that you?"

Shinpachi covered his eyes due to the light. However, he was able to make out a form of police officers in that fog.

"Hijikata-san?"

Upon hearing his name, Hijikata Toushirou stepped out from behind the men in uniforms who were holding swords and flashlights. His face was grim as smoke from his cigarette curled into the air.

Gintoki -who was unfazed by the ruckus and wore and equally dark expression- stared at the demon vice-commander of the Shinsengumi coolly.

"This is looking very suspicious. What the hell are you doing out here so late at night, Yorozuya?" questioned Hijikata.

"I could ask you the same," said Gin, "what is the great vice-commander doing out in the night here with his group of thugs? Trying to rip someone's tax off or something?"

The two grown men gave each other a long, hard stare. They were both being unusually edgy for their own reasons, and were about to have a serious face off, has it not been for Kondo Isao who came running down the street, tears and snot streaking down his face.

"Toshiiii! Have you found Sougo yet?! That stupid son of ours! I will hit him if I ever found out that he was fooling around with some girls! BECAUSE WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WITHOUT OUR PRECIOUS BABY?!"

The tension loosened immediately. Shinpachi's mouth hung open.

"_That _Okita-san is missing?! Is that why you guys are out here? Gin-san, could this have something to do with Kagura-chan's disappearance?"

"China-san is missing also?" asked Kondo while patting his face with a frilly white handkerchief, "DOES THIS MEAN THAT THEY HAVE ELOPED TOGETHER?!"

Hijikata face palmed as he put out his cigarette.

"Seems like we have something to discuss, Yorozuya." He said.

* * *

**Shinsengumi HQ: 4:30 AM**

They were sitting around the table on the tatami. Tea was served as the four men discussed about what could have happened to their two companions.

"So you're saying that she has been missing since 9 after she said she was going to take the dog out for a walk?" revised Hijikata. Shinpachi nodded.

"Yes. We started to look for her after 7, because we were worried about the Black Bunny Killer that has been going around."

Hijikata nodded. "Sougo went missing since his morning run too. He was supposed to come back for his afternoon nap before patrolling again at 5, but he never did. We were worried that he might have gone after the killer himself, knowing his sadistic personality. But as it turned out, no one has seen his _or _the killer's corpse yet."

"This is getting quite worried some," said Kondo as he blew his nose. He'd then passed his used tissue to Gin casually. "Here. Use this to wipe your inner tears, Yorozuya."

"Just stuff that thing right back up your nose, Gorilla." Said Gin, grossed out of his mind.

"But where could they be?" questioned Shinpachi. "Are the two cases even related at all?"

That was the perfect moment for Yamazaki to bust into the room with his ninja suit. He walked quickly to the table as he pulled down his face mask and dropped a phone down in front of the four men.

"The hell is this, Yamazaki?" asked Hijikata.

The ninja sat down with a serious face.

"After you told me to look for any clues since 5:30, I ran across some kids who were talking about an irregular event that happened in the park."

"Irregular event?" repeated Hijikata. Yamazaki nodded.

"They spotted a terrifying, destructive fight at the park."

All four men sprang up from their seat.

"Was it the killer?" Asked Kondo. But Yamazaki just looked uncomfortable as he pointed at the phone.

"Some kids got it taped on their phone, so I borrowed it. Please take at the clip yourself."

Shinpachi snapped the phone open and immediately went into the video clip. The other men leaned over his shoulder, all surrounding the small screen, before the clip will started rolling in a low quality stream.

* * *

_"__God dammit Sadist, you stepped on my feet, you low bastard!"_

_ "__I don't want to hear that from someone who grabbed and twisted my genitals, Miss Piggy! I could file this as a sexual assault!" _

_ "__I dare you to! I will report you in for abuse of authority before you can even cry 'Daddy please help me!'"_

_Flashes of weapon swept through the screen at an extremely fast speed. Few other dialogues were exchanged, but not caught on camera._

_ "__AHHH, BITCH DID YOU JUST LICKED YOUR FINGER AND STICK IT IN MY EAR?!"_

_ "__WHY YOU PIECE OF CRAP! YOU BIT ME!"_

_Name-callings and insults were exchanged, and then a flash of light suddenly beamed down from the sky onto the two. At this point, the screen was pretty much too bright, and the dialogues were too fuzzy to be heard properly._

_ "… __Sadist! Police officers are… citizens!"_

_ "__Goodbye, China… Danna and Megane… you died…"_

_ "__Fuck you… alone…"_

_ "__What… leggo! Lemme go!"_

_ "__GYAAAAAA!"_

* * *

The clip ended.

Silent filled the room.

Finally, Hijikata leaned back and took a long drag at his cigarette.

"From what we have just seen," he said, "I think that it is only correct that we conclude that they… Hmmm."

"They were abducted." Said Gintoki, rubbing his chin, "abducted by an alien like in some fucking alien movie."

* * *

**What could have happened to them ? XD**

**PLEASE COMMENT AND REVIEW!**


	3. Chapter 3

**When abducted by aliens (or God), make sure to at least drag someone with you.**

Nothing could have prepared Kagura for what was to come.

It was her usual walk with Sadaharu down the street. The sun was shining high, and the wind was riding low in the Edo city. However, the atmosphere was strangely quiet for such lively morning. Unspoken terror was in the air.

Patting her dog's back, the Yato girl led them to the crime scene which was basically wrapped in yellow tapes that said 'KEEP OUT'.

Being Kagura, she stepped over the tapes easily and made her way inside the alley. Shadow casted down from the building tops into the cramped pathway. But even so, the lack of light did not prevent the girl from seeing a dried pool of blood on the floor, along with that gruesome message written in red.

_SHAMED._

"No matter who you were, I know that there was nothing shameful about how you lived, uh huh," Kagura said while petting Sadaharu on the head. She ran her hand on the wall, and then noticed a piece of green fabric which she believed was a part of the victim's clothing.

Because they were the strongest, battles and casualties between Yatos were particularly cruel and gruesome; more than any race in the universe. Most of the warrior's corpses were beyond recognition after fights were over, and that's if you were lucky. If you were unlucky, you wouldn't have any remains left at all. Therefore, whatever was left from a warrior could be considered precious for family members.

Kagura picked up the green fabric and tucked it under her own parasol. It was the least she could do to honor the dead.

When she was done with her little ritual, Kagura walked out to see the last face she wanted to see in the universe; the face of that sadistic bi-shouen bastard, Okita Sougo.

To fuel her anger, that little gangster Chihuahua was smirking his smug little face off.

Kagura wanted so very much to wipe that smile off with her feet, for it looked like dirt that was stuck on the ground.

Okita, who must have read every expression from her face (since she made no attempt to conceal it), widened his smik.

"If a person could be arrested for their thoughts like in Psych*-pass, I can assure you that you would be in jail right now," said the police officer. His hands were hanging easily by his sides, though his crimson eyes were watching the Yato girl's every move for any action that could lead to criminal activities.

Before she came, he was bored to death with his patrol. Though, he wasn't exactly surprised he was assigned to stalk around the crime scene, since most serial killers have tendencies of coming back to where they killed their victims.

_"__Therefore, due to your warped, twisted, and sadistic mind, I believe that you would be a perfect candidate for job. Just patrol around, don't make it so obvious. Drop by occasionally," _said that goddamn vice-commander in Okita's mind. His insults (which could be taken as a compliment to some level) echoed in Okita's head.

_Thank god the China girl appeared_, he thought, _at least I have something better to do than guarding a freaking alley way. Honestly, does _Hijikata_-san thought that it was going to run away or something?_

That was when Kagura's voice snapped him out of his vengeful trance.

"If people could be arrested for their thoughts, then you would be on a death row, fool."

"Huh? Me? This dedicated innocent and loyal police?"

"Innocent my ass! You think I don't read Gintama? I see it on the manga all the time that you are always out to get someone! Like the Mayora!"

"Hijikata-san totally deserves it. His thoughts endangers every mayonnaise bottle in the galaxy," he nodded, agreeing with the devious voices inside his head that Hijikata deserved all the harassment, poisoning, curses, and attempted assassinations that he has been given thus far. "Moreover, are you stalking me, China girl? Because _that_ is the real crime."

Kagura spat. "That should be something you say to your Gorilla leader. And I would rather stalk Shinpachi to his Otsu-chan concerts than you, bastard!"

Having their patient tested, the two finally lunged at each other.

Kagura began the battle by whipping her parasol down on her opponent's head. Okita, of course, dodged gracefully to the side in a quick blur. He drew his katana, and was immediately jabbing the blade at the girl with no regard to the fact that they were _both_ committing a crime.

"Little piece of shit!" Kagura yelled when his katana flung one of her hair bun to the floor, breaking it in process. "You'll pay for that!"

"Not a chance, Miss Piggy…" Okita's taunt was cut short when one of her bullets hit his MP3 sheathe. "Damn, girl! This headphone was especially modified to be blasted loud enough to knock someone out! I was just about to accidentally switch it with Hijikata-san's !"

"FEEL THE PAIN, SADIST!"

With that, the fight escalated. Before the two knew it, they were throwing swings in the park while other kids were running for their lives.

Seeing her opportunity while Okita was busy fending the penguin slide away, she made a grab at his family jewel.

Okita hollered.

_This one is for you, Gin-chan! _She thought gleefully, remembering the time when her silver haired guardian taught her all about fighting dirty. Not to mention demonstrating it by ripping a tama (as in balls) of his robot copy, Kintoki.

Kagura swept her feet across the floor, but it was stepped on by Okita, who looked to be nearly in tear from the assault earlier.

"God dammit Sadist, you stepped on my feet, you low bastard!"

"I don't want to hear that from someone who grabbed and twisted my genitals, Miss Piggy! I could file this as a sexual assault!"

"I dare you to! I will report you in for abuse of authority before you can even cry 'Daddy please help me!'"

Flashes of weapon were exchanged at an extremely fast speed. Left with no other choice but remembering all the tricks up her sleeves, Kagura licked her finger before jamming it in Okita's eyes.

As luck may have it for him, she missed. The finger instead went into his left ear. The police officer was grossed out of his mind.

"AHHH, BITCH DID YOU JUST LICKED YOUR FINGER AND STICK IT IN MY EAR?!"

Fighting to gain an equal ground of dirty tricks, he yanked her close A nd bit her head.

"WHY YOU PIECE OF CRAP! YOU BIT ME!"

"THAT WAS NOTHING COMPARED TO WHAT YOU DID TO ME! WHAT AM I GOING TO DO IF I CAN'T HAVE CHILDREN ANYMORE? ARE YOU GOING TO TAKE A RESPONSIBILITY FOR IT? HUH?!"

"I DON'T CARE! I WILL JUST THINK THAT I RID THE WORLD OF EVILNESS!"

The two made space between them. They stared, before making the final sprint at each other.

"OHRAAAA!"

Right before they clashed, a beam of white light shone down from the sky.

They froze.

"The hell?" Kagura asked. But before she could move, her body was hoisted up into the air against her will. She, of course, made a ruckus.

Okita watched with a smirk while clapping his hands together.

"I see that God has finally taken your criminal offenses into his own hand and decided to summon you to heaven for divine punishments."

"This ain't right!" Kagura screamed. "God, if you have to take someone, take the Sadist! Police officers are supposed to protect citizens! But just look at him now! He is watching me, a girl in a tough situation, with a smile!"

Okita waved his hand as Kagura began to be lift up higher.

"Goodbye, China. I will be sure to tell Danna and Megane that you died, I mean, _were summoned_, by the heavens…"

Okita's tear jerking speech was interrupted by a yank of his ankle. Before long, his body was also hanging in the air… up-side-down.

Kagura laughed evilly. Her hand grabbed tightly to the Sadist while they were being lifted up higher into the light. "Fuck you! Like hell I am going alone!"

"What… This is a mistake, God! leggo! Lemme go!"

"NEVAH!"

The light shone brighter. And the two sinners couldn't hear anything but each other's screams.

"GYAHHHH!"

* * *

When they came to it, Kagura and Okita were on cold floor. Their body tangling on top of one another.

Kagura was the first to wake up. She could feel the heavy weight across her stomach. And when she made an attempt to see the thing that was on her, she was met with a very unpleasant surprise.

"Shit." She swore, shoving Okita off her body. "Hey, wake up, my fellow sinner. We're in heaven."

"Huh?" Okita murmured, disoriented, "heaven? Then why are you here? Shouldn't you be in hell?"

"That was my line… man, heaven is lame." Commented the girl while observing the room they were in. They were surrounded by iron walls in a room that was no bigger than a small garden. Okita, shaking his head, clamped his hand over her mouth.

"You shouldn't say that, God might be listening to us," then he looked at the ceiling and deadpanned, "did you hear that, God? I just came to your defense. Now let me free, I need to kill Hijikata-san and rid the world of evilness for you!"

"Screw you!" Whispered Kagura, peeling his hand away, "if God was really listening, then he would want us to get along and make up! We have to pretend that we can stand each other's faces."

"Oh, I see how it is."

Okita snaked his arms around Kagura's shoulders. Dumbfounded that his arms were holding her instead of strangling her, she let him do the talking.

"You still watching, God? See? I, like, am totally into this ugly girl. I don't judge people by their looks! Can you let me go now?"

_OH, I SEE WHERE THIS IS GOING, _thought Kagura while her eyes widened. She looked at Okita who nodded in a silent agreement, then wrapped her arm around him as well.

"Are you seeing this? Sadist and I are totally getting along! We are getting along better than Zura and Ellie! Uh huh!"

"Right? I am so into our new found friendship right now, I am on the verge of tears!"

"Me too! Dipshit… I mean, Sou-chan, you are the most beautiful friend I have ever!"

"Idiotic little sack of meat… I mean, Kagura-chan, I am so glad I found you, my besty!"

While cradling each other and yelling sickly sweet phrases for God to hear, they had no idea that someone - other than God - would actually be watching them from the security camera above. Someone with his orange antenna twitching like crazy while his teeth grinds in the most beastly way possible.

"Abuto?" Called Kamui, his eyes never leaving the screen which displayed his sister and some random guy clinging to each other, "come here for a second."

_Christ. I am the one who needs God, _Thought the subordinate while approaching his commander.

"Yes?"

"Are you seeing what I am seeing?"

"Yes."

"What am I seeing?"

Abuto scratched his head, unsure that there would be a correct answer to this question.

"Um… you are seeing your sister. Hugging someone while calling that person beautiful?"

"Abuto?"

"Yes?"

"This can't be right."

Attempting to make the situation better, Abuto laughed lightly.

"Well, you know, kids nowadays grow up like weeds. Before long, they are married and have babies… or something… like that…"

His sentence was killed when Kamui turned around with a creepy smile plastered on his face.

"Who the hell is that guy? I thought I told you that we only need her."

"He is some dude your sister grabbed on her way up here."

From the screen, the two youngster were still yelling love words without knowing that it was fueling the fire of a sis-con who was mistaken for God.

_"__Oh, Romero… I mean, Romeo… do you really think that God is seeing this shit right now?"_

_ "__Duh, Julia… I mean, Juliet. Just keep acting friendly if you want to go back to Earth! God must be wiping tears of joy right now, that's why he can't respond. Before long, he will fall for my awesome acting skill and let me resume my plans of killing Hijikata-san."_

"I have had it," said Kamui, getting up from his chair. He walked out of the room with a wave of his hand. "It's about time _God_ madehis appearance."

And even though he managed to sound cool, once stepped out of the room, Abuto saw that Kamui was skipping down the ship's hallway with a split personality. One was smiling and singing; the other chanting curses.

"Sister dear, I'll be right there."

"KILL THE BASTARD. HOW DARE HE LAY HIS HAND ON HER."

…

Abuto walked to the engine control room.

"Hey, Kahara," he greeted the engineer.

"Yes, Abuto-san, what can I do for you?"

"Prepare the ship for impact immediately."

* * *

***Psyco-Pass is a great anime about a society where people are judged based on their mental stability. The higher your numbers are, the more likely you are to commit a crime or be a psycho. **

**Heyy. Sorry for the late update. I have been having the most stressful weeks of my life lately. Just the other day, I crashed on the couch after coming back from my part-time work, and was out like a log. I slept for 7 hours straight with my contact lenses, socks, jeans, and everything else on. Funny thing was, my shirt had a print that said PARTY HARD. So I woke up and laughed my ass off. That was the worst ****_Party _****I have ever been to.**

**Anyway, hope you enjoyed the chapter. I will update again as soon as I am done with this Hellish week.**

**PLZ COMMENTS AND REVIEW!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Treat friends and foes alike.**

By the time Kamui arrived at the room where his sister and the police officer was held, Okita was hammering a voodoo doll to the wall and Kagura was Gangnam styling around the room.

"WOP, WOP, WOP WOP WOP," shouted Kagura, one hand circling the invisible rope in the air while jumping around with sweat dripping down her face, "Dammit, God! Are you seeing this worship dance shit right now?!"

"All shall return to darkness. With this invincible thread of soul, I condemned you, Hijikata Toushirou, to hell. Come, sinner, repent for your crimes and confess yourself before God… HIjikata-san, are you in there yet?"

Kamui could only watch as the madness unfolded in front of him from the other side of the iron door. He wasn't sure if he was ready to open the gate to the other world and put himself to the risk of being a true psycho yet. However, his resolution was confirmed when Kagura (unintentionally on purpose) kicked Okita in the back, resulting in him to grab her ankle then dragged her down to the floor.

_FWOOSH._

The door slide open, and the duo were immediately on their knees. Kamui walked in calmly.

It was Okita who made the first comment:

"Wow. God somewhat look like the criminal the Shinsengumi has been searching for. A major sexual predator, was it?"

And Kagura made the second one:

"PEDOOO, oh wait, that's my brother. PEDOOOO."

Then Kamui made the third one:

"I am not a sexual predator, fool. What lies are you feeding to my sister? Don't believe him; you know I'm in it for being a cool terrorist, yes?"

Okita made a face of disappointment. "So you are a fraud God? Like those homeless people who like to carry a sign around their necks, saying that the end is near, and are likely to be named Raoul?"

Awkward silent fell in the room for a moment. Kagura glared at Kamui who had a practiced smiled on his face. Tension and sparks flew between them. Kagura, alerted, clenched her muscles as her eyes darted for any potential weapon in the small space; there was a voodoo doll and a nail and a hammer. She could craft a few deadly things out of that.

"Why did you kidnap me?" Asked the girl through her gritted teeth.

Kamui smiled. "Now, I did not kidnap you; I know the safe code."

Kagura remembered the safe code. It was something that was taught to her when she entered the kindergarten. She could only go home from school with someone who knew the safe code, which she picked, and only the selected few knew it. This whole thing was invented to avoid potential kidnapping, which was happening a lot when the Yato population started to decline.

"Sadaharu 67, was it not?" Kamui asked almost teasingly.

Suddenly, Kagura felt the urge of violence washed over her. Before she knew it, she lunged at her brother barehanded.

Kamui moved back a few steps with ease. He began to block the oncoming attacks while Kagura fought blindly with temper.

"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" she yelled, "My safe code has changed since then! It is now Sadahura 69! I grew up! You don't know shit about me, PEDO KIDNAPPER!"

"What sort of a growing up did you do?" Okita wondered while watching the sibling showdown, "ah, 69. I see what you did there, Danna. Nice growing up."

Kamui, on the other hand, surprisingly blushed. "Who… who taught you such lewd numbers?!"

"Does it matter?! You sure as hell didn't teach me anything! You, who attacked his own family. You, who left his own sister for death on that cold planet. You, bastard, kidnapped me!" she panted, "I demand a family lawyer, dammit!"

"Coming right up," said a voice. Immediately, a voodoo doll was thrown at Kamui, and though it did him no harm as he caught it with one hand, it did distract him from the fight. Then Kagura felt a rusty nail in her hand, and Okita was right next to her, tossing a hammer up and down in his hand.

"Now, I understand that you took us up here to judge us for our crime, God," said the police officer calmly, "but I am here to be our lawyer. And I demand some explanations."

Kamui almost choked on his own laughter as he backed off, surprised by the attacks and the shocking statement. He could only pressed down his chuckling into a calm smile when his sister slammed him against the door and held the nail under his chin.

"Very well, sister and Earthling whom I do not know I do not care to know," he said, eyeing Kagura's serious face with amusement, "if you want an explanation, then come along."

* * *

"I don't trust him," murmured Kagura to Okita as they followed Kamui down the bright hallway, "he _is _my brother, so I know his bull shit when I smell it. I think I smell it now."

"You think I trust him any better? Your brother is a sexual predator. They are the last type of criminal I would trust. However, here we are, in this spacecraft, somewhere in the Galaxy. The best choice we have is to follow him and hope that none of us would be molested."

"Was he really evicted for being a sexual predator?" Kagura questioned with disgust on her face, "how low has that bastard sunken?"

Kamui, now offended by the offenses that are thrown around behind his back, finally whipped around to his sister and an Earthling.

"How many times do I have to tell you that I am not a sexual predator? I am a legitimate terrorist! I might have done a fair share of crap in my life, like killing my own subordinate or tore off my father's arm, but I never assaulted anyone sexually."

Okita snorted, "that's what all your friends in the jail said, Raoul."

"Who the hell is Raoul?"

The argument ended when the three arrived in front of a heavily guarded door. Kamui lifted his hand to his guards, and they opened the door, revealing a room filled with high quality technologies. In the middle, a large screen stood, beeping a green light soundlessly.

"Is this where you filmed and distributed you evil deeds, Raoul?" Okita asked in a monotone.

"GET ME OUTTA HERE!" Kagura yelled as she sprinted to the door, only to be grabbed by Okita.

"I ain't getting molested by alone. What do you want me to do, Raoul? Strip her or get stripped? I prefer the first one."

"I DON'T PREFER ANY OF THIS CRAP! LET ME GO, SADIST! HOW CAN YOU CALL YOURSELF A POLICE IF YOU CHANGE TO YOUR ENEMY'S SIDE SO QUICKLY?!"

"You, Earthling, let go of her. And no, I don't want anyone stripping in here. Had I wanted a stripper, I would have hire one." Kamui rubbed his forehead. It's been a while since he last dealt with anyone as crazy as he is; he forgot how tiring it could be, "You guys were the ones who wanted my explanations. Focus and shut up, or I'll kill ya."

While the other two yelled and kicked at each other, Kamui snapped his finger, causing a picture of a man in a red hooded cloak to pop up with a name label under his photo.

_Black Bunny Killer._

Immediately, Kagura and Okita stopped like a dog who saw a red dot on the floor.

Okita whistled.

"Well, that is certainly the devil himself on the screen."

* * *

**Edo City: 8:30 AM**

_Ding-dong._

Went the sound of the bell in front of Otose Snack House. Before long, Catherine, proudly the ugliest cat eared character of all anime, slammed the door to the side with a sneer.

"What da ya want with us so early in the morning, punk?! A whip in the ass, maybe?! Did ya drink here last night and could not get enough of my beautiful face, HAH?!"

The door ringer looked taken aback by the aggressive way of greeting, but regained his composure quickly.

"Oh, no. I'm looking for a young girl…"

"HAH?! I can't here you if you hide under that freaking hood! Have you no manners?! AND A YOUNG GIRL?! ARE YOU TRYING TO HIT ON THE KAGURA BRAT OR SOMETHING?! WHAT'S SO GOOD ABOUT A KID, ANYWAY?! "

Otose, who has finally had enough of her waitress yelling in the morning, slammed her fist down on the counter.

"Catherine, cut him some slack and get your ass back to the dishes!"

"But Otose-san, this punk is trying to hit on Kagura!"

"If you don't stop running your mouth, I will put a vase over your head."

Catherine, upon hearing one of the things cat hate the most, walked behind the other door to spy on the stranger.

Otose sighed, "Sorry about that. What is it you need?"

The stranger walked in and pulled his red hood down, revealing a face of a young man with bright blue eyes and black hair. He was tall, though slender. Couldn't have been older that twenty five. The look of his face was boyish and pleasant.

And for some unknown reason, all the senses in Catherine's body spiked up. She hissed quietly, unnoticed by the stranger.

Otose, however, remained unfazed by the tension released from this young man as he handed her a photo of someone she knew well.

"I am looking for her, you see. Her name is Kagura. Your friend over there mentioned her earlier. I heard that she lives around here."

"I see. And who might you be?"

The stranger smiled. "I am her older brother, Kamui."

Otose nodded. "So you are her older brother, huh. I assume that you know the safe code?"

Once again, he smiled. "Sadaharu 67."

A smirk appeared ghostly on Otose's face as she handed the photo back to him. "She has grown up since. It is now Sadaharu 69. Sorry, but I even if I knew where she live, I can't help you with this. Apparently, she was abducted by an alien yesterday."

The young man lifted his eyebrow, "abducted?"

"Yes," Otose answered, blowing a puff of smoke of her cigar nonchalantly, "you know, with the light beaming down from the sky and stuff. What a scary world we live in nowadays, yes, young man?"

"How curious. Well, thank you for your information."

The stranger pulled his hood over and walked out. Catherine popped up from behind the door.

"Otose-san, that guy…"

"I know, Catherine." Otose interrupted. "I lived with guys who roamed the battlefield all my life. I can smell blood on a warrior like I can smell chocolate on a fat kid. That stranger was no ordinary young man."

"What do we do? I think he is suspicious. I don't approve of him dating Kagura… or being her brother."

"Are you stupid or something? How could someone like that be her brother? The last time I watched Gintama opening, her brother looked sassier than that… and with pink hair. This dude looked like a man on a mission." She rubbed her chin, "Tama, are you there?"

"Yes, Otose-sama." Answered Tama as she walked out from behind the bar. Otose waved her hand. "Play the Light Infection opening."

A mini screen shot out of Tama's eyes, showing Takasugi's face on a ship.

"Rewind that a little… no, that's too far. Forward, forward… stop! Perfect."

A picture of Kamui appeared on the screen, and Otose nodded to herself. "See? I knew it. This guy is just some IC that appeared in some random fanfiction. Tama, go to Gintoki and Shinpachi, and give them some message."

"I understand, Otose-sama. What is the exact message you would like to deliver to them?"

Catherine jumped over immediately, "Tell them that a suspicious but good looking fella is looking for Kagura."

Otose pushed her head out of the way, "Now, we don't even have a proof that he is suspicious. All we have is an old lady's hunch and a cat's instinct."

"Then how are we going to get those two alerted and aware of that guy without telling them that he have a chance of being a murderer?"

Otose cocked her head to the side, and then smiled slyly. "Just tell them that some punk is trying to hit on Kagura. That will get them to polish their armor and get ready to shine, alright."

* * *

*** Raoul: The name of a homeless man who was actually God's messenger in the book I have once read, called "What in God's name". He was told by God to alert the world that the end is near, and decided to do so by taking a walk on the highway with the sign 'the end is near' hanging around his neck. I don't know. I found it very funny, and just had to reference it.**

**TATADAAAAA**

**Sorry for the late update. I have some problem with logging in for the past few weeks, dont know what went wrong though. But here it is!**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


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